Reboot

The Frequently-Postponed Day One

As usual, I have delayed something again.  I was not able to undergo my Annual Physical Exam last year, and so it has been more than two years since I last saw a doctor or had a test.  I am grateful that there was no urgent reason to push me to consult a doctor. I am very grateful.

But the weight gain, oh, the weight gain. Must I blame it on this perimenopausal stage, my slow metabolism, my breastfeeding and weaning, the hormonal imbalances?  Or my grief–binging on my brother's favourite food to comfort me, my yayaless-life-therefore-no-time-for-exercise?  All these perhaps, plus(!) my appetite are at fault. And my lack of self-control.

And no, the blame can't be on my thyroids, according to my doc.

My ultrasound showed another 5-cm myoma.  And my OB recommends a hysterectomy (which she also did 6 years ago, but I opted for alternative/naturopathic treatment) since I MUST NOT bear children anymore. She said the surgery could wait since a fibroid (myoma) is benign. The location and size however might eventually press onto my urether and cause a back flow, eventually damaging my kidney. So in the meantime that I have not decided to undergo a hysterectomy, I must watch out for UTI or back pain which could signal that the kidney is already affected. She also recommended a kidney ultrasound to make sure.

So I am back where I was 6 years ago. I have been neglectful of this temple and I must face the consequences. I thank God for using the test results to urge me to reboot. I am determined to go back to the same game plan I followed in 2007. Will write about that soon.

I barely passed the Day One test.  But I did.

"Lord, thank You for Your amazing grace. Would You this time, enable me to be gentler on myself? I know it will be a doubly challenging journey. But in You I hope. May the end be another fresh start. Temper my confidence, having experienced success 6 years ago, my tendency is to expect results to be as quick and easily achieved like the last time. In Jesus' name."

The fruit I want to harvest in this reboot isn't just healing, or getting healthy and fit once more. I pray that I bear the fruit of the Holy Spirit.

"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law." (Gal.5:22,23)

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Food (Diary) is Good

I have proven the effectiveness of keeping a Food Blog. I recognize that accountability works wonders. So I am taking my husband and my sister with me through this challenge, to try being healthier this next month. I recognize how we all enjoy eating, and must treat ourselves to a food holiday once a week.

Sometimes, kindness to self has to be a discipline done at least once a week, or 6 days weekly. However you see it.